Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
