Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
