hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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