i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Just puked most of my soul out..
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
