The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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