fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
