...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
