so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
