Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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