dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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