That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I think I just sharted jello shots
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
