It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Green mimosas i think yes
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
