It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
It's shark week go big or go home
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize