whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
