Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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