Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
