i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
