thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize