Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
