I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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