I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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