I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
