I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
