drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
