Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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