dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
