I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
i think im in europe. pls send help
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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