my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
