I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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