.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
