Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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