woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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