Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
