So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
