Don't you send me to vm
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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