I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
