We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize