and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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