I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize
