Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
