mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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