just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
