Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
