Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
