I want to stick my p in your. b.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
