I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
