I heard we made out
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
