Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
