someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
