Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
